Tatiana Says About Her Love for Michael Jackson
Earlier, on this page, you met Tatiana Tumbzan. Now, join us to read the story Tatiana tells about how she met and became friends with Michael Jackson, and how their relationship ended. Below, we will read excerpts from the two books she wrote about this.
Unfortunately, the exaggeration and fantasy in her books makes it somewhat difficult to trust parts of what she writes. In some cases, Tatiana mentions people whose identities are not clearly known, or what their relationship to Michael was and what their role was in the team. She also refers to traits in Michael that are not known. For example, she says someone told her that Michael talked about her all the time. This story has not been repeated by anyone else. Also, Michael did not have the habit of discussing personal matters of his life with his coworkers or employees. Still, perhaps some truths can be found in these books.
Michael fans’ reactions to Tatiana are varied. Some believe her, while others consider her just another opportunist who makes money by selling books about Michael. However, the truth of the matter is that her role in Michael Jackson’s video is the only lasting work we have seen from her—and after that, we have not witnessed any brilliance from her in the fields of dance and music, nor in modeling or acting. She has always been an ordinary person with an extraordinary experience: kissing the greatest showman in history on stage. She is the girl Michael chased… and it seems that with just that one role, she became part of history.
Here, we only recount her claims, and this does not mean that we confirm the correctness of all of them.
"In 1987, my manager introduced me to audition for an acting role in a video clip. I wasn’t told which artist the clip belonged to, but later I realized that 200 young actresses had joined the audition with hope of getting the role.
When they called me for the audition, I was told to step forward and do a few moves. Filming took place on a street and on uneven ground. A few actor men’s job was to bother me and say things like, ‘Hey, honey, how are you?’ On the street, when I went to the filming location, the same thing happened to me—I was bothered by a few people—so I was ready to play this scene. I ran across the ground a few times and my moves were filmed.
A few days later, I was called in for rehearsal, and for the first time I understood that the clip ‘The Way You Make Me Feel’ was being made for Michael Jackson.
Vince Patterson, my choreographer, took me into a room. Michael was there, but I was so embarrassed that I couldn’t even look at him. Vince greeted Michael warmly. It seemed to me that they had a friendly relationship. But I didn’t dare to look at Michael, and my eyes were fixed on Vince.
Vince said that Michael would perform part of the song live, and when he reached a certain section, I had to walk along a path. Patterson reminded me to show the moves he wanted, and I did them perfectly. Then I took a quick look at Michael. He was sitting there, wearing a red T-shirt, and with a wide, joyful smile he was moving his body along with the music playing. I saw him say something to the person next to him. Later, I heard from David Benkz, one of the writers, that Michael had said: ‘This is exactly what we wanted. Tell the others to go.’
I will never forget the moment my manager told me I had been accepted for this clip. I screamed so loudly that I think everyone in Hollywood could hear me. For me, it was a turning point. I felt like I had finally succeeded, and that my career would soon take an upward path."
"Filming this clip took five days. I didn’t want it to end.
The last day was dedicated to retakes and getting close-ups of my face. But it was on the second day of filming that the ice between me and Michael broke.
That’s when it happened: he was chasing me, and I had to go into a broken-down car parked on the street. My outfit was so tight that to move from one side to the other, I had to turn around. In one moment, the high heel boot I was wearing got stuck inside the seat cover, and I couldn’t get it out.
Michael put his hand on my shin and then up on my thigh so he could pull my leg out. I got a little hot and excited, and then a little later I returned to normal. I was thrown out of the car and landed on my butt on the ground. When he was brushing the dirt off my clothes, we both burst into laughter. Then, for a moment, we looked at each other. After that, a warm and friendly connection began between the two of us.
In the few days after that, while we were busy recording on stage, Michael asked me questions about my life. He once told me that the way I walked in the video was very attractive.
Not long after filming ended, Craig—Michael’s representative, who had become friends with me—called me and said, ‘You know, Michael has been talking about you the whole time. He asked me how I was, and told me to tell you hello. I think he really likes you. He says you’re incredibly beautiful and sweet.’
Craig suggested that I go to the filming set of another Michael clip called Leave Me Alone. I thought it was a great idea. Craig told Michael, and a few days later I was invited to go to the filming set.
It was great that I could see Michael again. He took me around the set to show me everything. I watched the filming, and then Michael and his manager, Frank Dileo, ate in a food wagon together.
When I got into the food wagon, Frank Dileo took control of everything. Michael seemed a little awkward, as if he had lost the words. He kindly invited me to sit down. Michael sat by the window, and I sat next to him. As Dileo was taking food dishes out of his bag, Michael opened his own dish like a kid with impatience and started eating. Dileo said, ‘So, how’s it going?’"
"After The Way You Make Me Feel, I was contacted by my handler and asked to play in another Michael clip called Dirty Diana. But Frank Dileo, Michael’s manager, wasn’t happy."
Explanation from eMJey: The girl who appears in the Dirty Diana video is a model named Lisa Dean. For years, people believed that the legs shown in the ‘Dirty Diana’ video belonged to Tatiana. Lisa Dean, like Michael, died in 2009 at the age of 50. It was said that she had the best legs in all of Hollywood.
Kissing Michael on stage and being kicked out of the tour
On March 3, 1988, Michael performed a charity concert at Madison Square Garden in New York in support of black colleges in America. It was during this concert, while performing TWYMMF, that Tatiana surprised Michael with a kiss on stage.
The day before, at the 30th annual Grammy Music Awards ceremony, Michael had performed the song on stage with Tatiana.
Tatiana says about the kiss: "After the song ended, he looked at me in such a charming way. I went to him and kissed him. I could hear the noise of the crowd, and it felt like they were nervous."
After the kiss, Tatiana went backstage, but Michael stayed on stage to perform the next song. Tatiana says that backstage everyone was shocked.
"I think Michael enjoyed the surprise because I could hear his laughter in every note he sang. I went toward the dressing room and saw Frank Dileo. I ran toward him, but he gave me a terrifying look! I kept asking myself why Dileo looked at me like that?"
Explanation from eMJey: For artists at Michael Jackson’s level, and in this category of professional work, it’s completely normal to tighten the circle of people who are allowed to get close to them on stage. In other words, only a few people are allowed to approach or make contact with them on stage, and any kind of contact must be planned and determined in advance. In this sense, Tatiana’s behavior was completely unprofessional. In interviews after this event, Tatiana told the media that their kiss was planned, but later she took it back and said the kiss was actually a surprise.
Tatiana says that on March 6, she was told that she had been fired from her job and that from then on Sheryl Crow would take her place on stage.
"Miko Brando told me that a young woman named Sheryl Crow had replaced me on the team. He apologized to me and asked me to call him before my flight.
This was a terrible blow to me and made me upset. I didn’t know the reason for this replacement. I got worried and thought about it every day. I called Frank Dileo, but I didn’t get an answer. Michael never replied to me. I also called MJG Productions (Michael’s company). But they also didn’t answer my calls.
When I saw the footage of Michael performing on stage, where another woman had taken my place, I knew that fans would ask where Tatiana was and why she wasn’t on stage.
I told one of the team members named Brown how much I would have loved to talk to Michael, and they had quickly moved him elsewhere before I could even see him. I explained to Mr. and Mrs. Jackson that I wasn’t able to meet Michael and couldn’t get answers to my questions. I never received a letter from Michael, and I never heard even a word from him. There wasn’t a day when I didn’t ask God in my prayers to give me the chance to talk to Michael.
The Bad tour was full of bitter and very confusing memories for me. But working with Michael was a dream I had since childhood—and now it had come true.
After that night, wherever fans saw me, they asked me about Michael and our relationship, and wherever I went, Michael’s name was always with me. I was bombarded with questions. But none of the people in the industry wanted to hear what I had to say. I became disappointed and discouraged. The media called me Michael Jackson’s girlfriend.
Why do I still want to talk to Michael after all these years? I want to know what happened that night and why they kicked me out of the tour. I want the chance to talk to him so that after all these years I can come to terms with it and find peace.
I was told that if Michael fell in love with you and married you, Frank Dileo would be worried because he wouldn’t be the closest person to Michael anymore, and his value and credibility would decrease."
"I have suffered a great deal in this world emotionally, but the one who has suffered more than me is the person who has been blindly mistreated. His name is Michael Joseph Jackson.
I loved Michael more than life itself. He was my life, and when I left the tour in 1988, I also lost a part of my soul. That event wounded my spirit. After that, I never truly recovered. But what gave me peace was believing that God would bring us together at a better time and place, and that nothing would ever be able to separate us again. I believe very much in heaven. I know it exists.
I think the suffering I went through is only a small example of what he had to endure during his short life on earth.
I loved him honestly and unconditionally. But for reasons I don’t know, God didn’t want us to be together.
There was a special chemistry between Michael and me, and there was definitely attraction for each other. It was my duty and source of joy to make him happy and keep him lively.
But those who surrounded him considered me a threat. He was their cash-making machine, and they couldn’t afford to lose him for love and a possible marriage.
His fan base was growing day by day, and the fear of losing even one of them made their hair turn white.
When I worked with Michael, there was no man more beautiful than him in the world—both outwardly and inwardly. He took my breath away. He was the first man whose love I confessed to my mother. Before that, I had never told her anything about any man."
She compares the moment of kissing Michael to a fairy tale that turned into a nightmare because of the hostile and jealous looks of others. After that, the media said that this future husband was now the queen of madness whose crown had been taken from her.
Tatiana writes:
"Now that my king is gone, his love still makes my heart race. This is my lost love story that was never told.
Tatiana has never married and has no children. She says she doesn’t want to bring a child into this world just out of curiosity. However, she writes that if she had married Michael Jackson, not having a child would never have been an option she would choose.
Source: eMJey.com / firpocarr.com / Amazon.com
Unfortunately, the exaggeration and fantasy in her books makes it somewhat difficult to trust parts of what she writes. In some cases, Tatiana mentions people whose identities are not clearly known, or what their relationship to Michael was and what their role was in the team. She also refers to traits in Michael that are not known. For example, she says someone told her that Michael talked about her all the time. This story has not been repeated by anyone else. Also, Michael did not have the habit of discussing personal matters of his life with his coworkers or employees. Still, perhaps some truths can be found in these books.
Michael fans’ reactions to Tatiana are varied. Some believe her, while others consider her just another opportunist who makes money by selling books about Michael. However, the truth of the matter is that her role in Michael Jackson’s video is the only lasting work we have seen from her—and after that, we have not witnessed any brilliance from her in the fields of dance and music, nor in modeling or acting. She has always been an ordinary person with an extraordinary experience: kissing the greatest showman in history on stage. She is the girl Michael chased… and it seems that with just that one role, she became part of history.
Here, we only recount her claims, and this does not mean that we confirm the correctness of all of them.
======================================
1. Excerpts from the book The Way He Made Me Feel
Tatiana writes:
"Tiana was my name on stage. When we got off the Bad tour team’s bus, I could hear that fans were calling my name too.
After the concert ended, many artists gathered backstage to see Michael. I doubted that most of them would reach their goal. Because Michael always acted like Zorro and disappeared!
I remember when I saw the first Jackson Five performance on stage. I liked not only their music, but also Michael—the youngest member of the group. When I saw his performance for the first time, I thought he was the best showman I had ever seen.
At the time Ben was released as a single (release: 1972), I felt weak with the desire to send Michael a letter. I wrote letters several times in a row, and I ruined them all. I threw the crumpled papers on the ground.
Michael was the only man who had the key to my heart."
Beginning of a relationship
"In 1987, my manager introduced me to audition for an acting role in a video clip. I wasn’t told which artist the clip belonged to, but later I realized that 200 young actresses had joined the audition with hope of getting the role.
When they called me for the audition, I was told to step forward and do a few moves. Filming took place on a street and on uneven ground. A few actor men’s job was to bother me and say things like, ‘Hey, honey, how are you?’ On the street, when I went to the filming location, the same thing happened to me—I was bothered by a few people—so I was ready to play this scene. I ran across the ground a few times and my moves were filmed.
A few days later, I was called in for rehearsal, and for the first time I understood that the clip ‘The Way You Make Me Feel’ was being made for Michael Jackson.
Vince Patterson, my choreographer, took me into a room. Michael was there, but I was so embarrassed that I couldn’t even look at him. Vince greeted Michael warmly. It seemed to me that they had a friendly relationship. But I didn’t dare to look at Michael, and my eyes were fixed on Vince.
Vince said that Michael would perform part of the song live, and when he reached a certain section, I had to walk along a path. Patterson reminded me to show the moves he wanted, and I did them perfectly. Then I took a quick look at Michael. He was sitting there, wearing a red T-shirt, and with a wide, joyful smile he was moving his body along with the music playing. I saw him say something to the person next to him. Later, I heard from David Benkz, one of the writers, that Michael had said: ‘This is exactly what we wanted. Tell the others to go.’
I will never forget the moment my manager told me I had been accepted for this clip. I screamed so loudly that I think everyone in Hollywood could hear me. For me, it was a turning point. I felt like I had finally succeeded, and that my career would soon take an upward path."
"Filming this clip took five days. I didn’t want it to end.
The last day was dedicated to retakes and getting close-ups of my face. But it was on the second day of filming that the ice between me and Michael broke.
That’s when it happened: he was chasing me, and I had to go into a broken-down car parked on the street. My outfit was so tight that to move from one side to the other, I had to turn around. In one moment, the high heel boot I was wearing got stuck inside the seat cover, and I couldn’t get it out.
Michael put his hand on my shin and then up on my thigh so he could pull my leg out. I got a little hot and excited, and then a little later I returned to normal. I was thrown out of the car and landed on my butt on the ground. When he was brushing the dirt off my clothes, we both burst into laughter. Then, for a moment, we looked at each other. After that, a warm and friendly connection began between the two of us.
In the few days after that, while we were busy recording on stage, Michael asked me questions about my life. He once told me that the way I walked in the video was very attractive.
Not long after filming ended, Craig—Michael’s representative, who had become friends with me—called me and said, ‘You know, Michael has been talking about you the whole time. He asked me how I was, and told me to tell you hello. I think he really likes you. He says you’re incredibly beautiful and sweet.’
Craig suggested that I go to the filming set of another Michael clip called Leave Me Alone. I thought it was a great idea. Craig told Michael, and a few days later I was invited to go to the filming set.
It was great that I could see Michael again. He took me around the set to show me everything. I watched the filming, and then Michael and his manager, Frank Dileo, ate in a food wagon together.
When I got into the food wagon, Frank Dileo took control of everything. Michael seemed a little awkward, as if he had lost the words. He kindly invited me to sit down. Michael sat by the window, and I sat next to him. As Dileo was taking food dishes out of his bag, Michael opened his own dish like a kid with impatience and started eating. Dileo said, ‘So, how’s it going?’"
Filming Leave Me Alone
"At the end of the day, I didn’t have a way to get back home. The cost of getting to the studio had become more than I had expected. I also didn’t have enough money to pay for a taxi ride. Craig pushed me to ask Michael to take me home.
I was very embarrassed to ask Michael directly. I explained the situation to Miko Brando, Marlon Brando’s son and Michael’s right-hand man, and asked him if he could lend me a few dollars or take me home. Miko suggested that I bring it up with Michael, but he told me he didn’t think there was anything wrong with them taking me home.
A few minutes later, I was on my way home. I was sitting next to Michael in a black Mercedes, and Miko was driving. At first, Michael seemed a little nervous, like a little boy. We talked a lot—mostly about our families. And then, after a while, we were holding hands. When I got out of the car, I told Michael that I hoped to see him again. He said, ‘Oh… you’ll see.’"
"After The Way You Make Me Feel, I was contacted by my handler and asked to play in another Michael clip called Dirty Diana. But Frank Dileo, Michael’s manager, wasn’t happy."
Explanation from eMJey: The girl who appears in the Dirty Diana video is a model named Lisa Dean. For years, people believed that the legs shown in the ‘Dirty Diana’ video belonged to Tatiana. Lisa Dean, like Michael, died in 2009 at the age of 50. It was said that she had the best legs in all of Hollywood.
Kissing Michael on stage and being kicked out of the tour
On March 3, 1988, Michael performed a charity concert at Madison Square Garden in New York in support of black colleges in America. It was during this concert, while performing TWYMMF, that Tatiana surprised Michael with a kiss on stage.
The day before, at the 30th annual Grammy Music Awards ceremony, Michael had performed the song on stage with Tatiana.
Tatiana says about the kiss: "After the song ended, he looked at me in such a charming way. I went to him and kissed him. I could hear the noise of the crowd, and it felt like they were nervous."
After the kiss, Tatiana went backstage, but Michael stayed on stage to perform the next song. Tatiana says that backstage everyone was shocked.
"I think Michael enjoyed the surprise because I could hear his laughter in every note he sang. I went toward the dressing room and saw Frank Dileo. I ran toward him, but he gave me a terrifying look! I kept asking myself why Dileo looked at me like that?"
Explanation from eMJey: For artists at Michael Jackson’s level, and in this category of professional work, it’s completely normal to tighten the circle of people who are allowed to get close to them on stage. In other words, only a few people are allowed to approach or make contact with them on stage, and any kind of contact must be planned and determined in advance. In this sense, Tatiana’s behavior was completely unprofessional. In interviews after this event, Tatiana told the media that their kiss was planned, but later she took it back and said the kiss was actually a surprise.
Tatiana says that on March 6, she was told that she had been fired from her job and that from then on Sheryl Crow would take her place on stage.
"Miko Brando told me that a young woman named Sheryl Crow had replaced me on the team. He apologized to me and asked me to call him before my flight.
This was a terrible blow to me and made me upset. I didn’t know the reason for this replacement. I got worried and thought about it every day. I called Frank Dileo, but I didn’t get an answer. Michael never replied to me. I also called MJG Productions (Michael’s company). But they also didn’t answer my calls.
When I saw the footage of Michael performing on stage, where another woman had taken my place, I knew that fans would ask where Tatiana was and why she wasn’t on stage.
I told one of the team members named Brown how much I would have loved to talk to Michael, and they had quickly moved him elsewhere before I could even see him. I explained to Mr. and Mrs. Jackson that I wasn’t able to meet Michael and couldn’t get answers to my questions. I never received a letter from Michael, and I never heard even a word from him. There wasn’t a day when I didn’t ask God in my prayers to give me the chance to talk to Michael.
The Bad tour was full of bitter and very confusing memories for me. But working with Michael was a dream I had since childhood—and now it had come true.
After that night, wherever fans saw me, they asked me about Michael and our relationship, and wherever I went, Michael’s name was always with me. I was bombarded with questions. But none of the people in the industry wanted to hear what I had to say. I became disappointed and discouraged. The media called me Michael Jackson’s girlfriend.
Why do I still want to talk to Michael after all these years? I want to know what happened that night and why they kicked me out of the tour. I want the chance to talk to him so that after all these years I can come to terms with it and find peace.
I was told that if Michael fell in love with you and married you, Frank Dileo would be worried because he wouldn’t be the closest person to Michael anymore, and his value and credibility would decrease."
Frank Dileo next to Michael
Explanation from eMJey: It’s unclear from whom Tatiana is quoting this. Besides, although Michael fired Frank Dileo on February 14, 1989 after the tour ended, he didn’t invite Tatiana back to his team. The reason for Michael and Frank’s separation was never stated. When Michael decided to do the This Is It tour in London in 2009, he invited Frank back to his team again. Over these years, even though there wasn’t a working relationship between Michael and Frank, they remained close friends. In 2005, following the allegations against Michael, Frank supported him and attended his court sessions, and it’s said he remained loyal to him until the moment of his death. Tatiana’s claim about Frank Dileo has not been proven. In addition, Michael Jackson’s colleagues have always talked about how determined and driven he was in his work decisions. In other words, Michael always had the final say.
Family and media reactions
Tatiana says that Michael’s mother and father always treated her gently and kindly, and it seemed like they were on her side.
"After I was separated from the team, when I faced financial problems, Mrs. Jackson lent me fifty dollars. I received a black-and-white cat as a gift and named it ‘Magic Michael’ (Michael the Magic)."
After the kiss, Tatiana was asked about her relationship with Michael in a television interview. Tatiana said that Michael never directly confessed his love to her, but she always heard from people close to Michael—and especially from his mother—that Michael was interested in her. In that same interview, Katherine Jackson confirmed her statements during a phone call and said that Michael had personally told her that he was in love with Tatiana.
The people who asked Tatiana about her relationship in that interview didn’t believe her words, and Michael himself never said anything about it personally.
Tatiana’s critics believed that Katherine Jackson had confirmed Michael’s feelings for Tatiana only because she wanted her son to get married.
======================================
2. In her new book, The King of My Heart, Tatiana writes:
"I have suffered a great deal in this world emotionally, but the one who has suffered more than me is the person who has been blindly mistreated. His name is Michael Joseph Jackson.
I loved Michael more than life itself. He was my life, and when I left the tour in 1988, I also lost a part of my soul. That event wounded my spirit. After that, I never truly recovered. But what gave me peace was believing that God would bring us together at a better time and place, and that nothing would ever be able to separate us again. I believe very much in heaven. I know it exists.
I think the suffering I went through is only a small example of what he had to endure during his short life on earth.
I loved him honestly and unconditionally. But for reasons I don’t know, God didn’t want us to be together.
There was a special chemistry between Michael and me, and there was definitely attraction for each other. It was my duty and source of joy to make him happy and keep him lively.
But those who surrounded him considered me a threat. He was their cash-making machine, and they couldn’t afford to lose him for love and a possible marriage.
His fan base was growing day by day, and the fear of losing even one of them made their hair turn white.
When I worked with Michael, there was no man more beautiful than him in the world—both outwardly and inwardly. He took my breath away. He was the first man whose love I confessed to my mother. Before that, I had never told her anything about any man."
She compares the moment of kissing Michael to a fairy tale that turned into a nightmare because of the hostile and jealous looks of others. After that, the media said that this future husband was now the queen of madness whose crown had been taken from her.
Tatiana writes:
"Now that my king is gone, his love still makes my heart race. This is my lost love story that was never told.
Tatiana has never married and has no children. She says she doesn’t want to bring a child into this world just out of curiosity. However, she writes that if she had married Michael Jackson, not having a child would never have been an option she would choose.
Source: eMJey.com / firpocarr.com / Amazon.com